Cyberbullying: how parents can document the evidence

Step one: talk to your child, not to the bully

Children often hide cyberbullying for weeks because they are ashamed, or because they fear the adult reaction more than the bullying itself. If your child has told you, or you have found out, the most important thing you can do in the next hour is to stay calm and make it clear they are not in trouble.

Ask open questions and listen. You need to understand what is happening, where (which app, which group chat, which account), since when and who else is involved. You do not need every detail in the first conversation.

• Tell them it is not their fault and that telling you was the right thing to do.
• Ask what they would like to happen. Older children in particular want a say in whether the school is told.
• Agree together that nothing will be deleted for now, even the worst messages, so there is a record.
• Check whether they feel physically safe at school and on the way there.

What not to do, even though you will want to

• Do not take the phone away as a punishment. Children who lose their phone for reporting bullying stop reporting it, and the bullying continues where you cannot see it.
• Do not reply to the bully, comment publicly or post about the situation. It escalates things and can be used against your child.
• Do not contact the other child or their parents online in anger. If contact is needed, let the school arrange it.
• Do not report, block or ask for deletion before you have captured the content. Once removed, it is usually gone for you too.
• Do not log into anyone else's account or create fake profiles to gather evidence. That can be a crime and can make the evidence unusable.

Blocking and reporting are right, just not first. The order that protects your child is: listen, capture, then report and block.

What to document

Think of it as building a picture for someone who has never seen any of it: a teacher, a platform moderator or a police officer. They need to see what was said, where, by which account and when.

• Messages and group chats: the hurtful messages themselves, plus enough of the conversation before and after to show context, and the group name and member list.
• Public posts, comments and replies about your child, including the post they sit under.
• Fake or impersonation profiles: the profile page, its username, display name, profile URL and photos.
• Stories, statuses and short-lived posts: these often expire after 24 hours, so capture them the same day.
• Usernames and profile URLs of every account involved. Display names can change in seconds, the URL or handle is what identifies the account.
• Dates and times: when each message or post appeared, and when you captured it.
• Anything from offline life that connects to it: a note, a comment in class, witnesses.

More on preserving social media content before it disappears →

Stop: intimate images and sextortion are a different case

• Sextortion (someone threatening to share images unless your child pays or sends more): do not pay, do not send anything further and do not delete the conversation. Stop replying and report it to the police straight away.
• Reassure your child. Victims of sextortion are often terrified and ashamed; they need to hear clearly that they are not the one in trouble.
• Let the police or hotline secure the material. They have the legal basis and the tools to do it, and to ask platforms to remove it.
• Keep the phone as it is and do not reset it, so investigators can examine it if needed.

Everything else in this guide, such as captures and incident logs, applies to ordinary bullying content: insults, threats, exclusion, humiliating but non-sexual posts and fake profiles.

How to capture it properly

Screenshots on your child's device

For private messages and group chats, the quickest record is a screenshot on the device where the messages arrived. Do this together with your child, so they stay in control and do not feel their phone has been taken over.

1. Make sure the date and time are visible, either in the chat or in the phone's status bar. If the chat only shows times, scroll up so the date separator is in the shot.
2. Capture the sender's name and, if possible, open their profile and capture the username too.
3. Take several overlapping screenshots for long conversations so nothing is cut out.
4. Copy the screenshots to a second place you control, such as a computer or a private folder, and do not edit or crop the originals.
5. Note in your log what each screenshot shows and when you took it.

Forensic capture of public posts and profiles

A screenshot is an image that anyone could edit, and schools or police sometimes hear that argument from the other side. For public posts, comments and fake profiles, a forensic capture is much harder to dispute. With GetProofAnchor you paste the public URL and receive a full-page capture with the page source, a network log, SHA-256 hashes, an eIDAS qualified timestamp and a Bitcoin anchor, packed in an Evidence ZIP anyone can verify. A one-time Starter pack of three proofs costs 9 €, with no subscription.

Some content is visible only when your child is logged in: a private account, a closed group, direct messages. A server cannot see behind a login, so on subscription plans the browser widget captures exactly what is on screen in your child's own logged-in browser. Sit down together, let your child open the page in their own account, and capture it with them. Never use someone else's login or a fake profile to reach content.

Platform guide: capturing evidence from TikTok →

Keep a simple incident log

Bullying is usually a pattern, not a single event, and a pattern is what convinces a school or a police officer. A plain table or notebook is enough. For each incident note:

• Date and approximate time it happened.
• Where it happened: app, group chat, profile URL, or at school.
• Who was involved, by username and, if known, real name.
• What happened, in a sentence or two, in neutral words.
• What you captured and where it is stored.
• What you did next: report, school contact, reply received.

Write facts, not conclusions. A log that says on 3 October, account xyz posted a photo of our daughter with a mocking caption, 14 comments reads far better than one full of anger, even when the anger is justified.

Report to the school

If the bullying involves classmates, the school is usually the fastest route to making it stop, even when it happens outside school hours. Most schools have an anti-bullying policy or a designated contact person, and many are required to act on it.

• Ask for the school's anti-bullying policy and who is responsible for it.
• Put your report in writing (email is fine) and attach a short summary of your log plus the key captures.
• Ask what the school will do, by when, and how your child will be protected in the meantime.
• Keep copies of everything you send and receive.

For teachers and school staff: if a pupil shows you bullying content, the same rules apply. Capture ordinary bullying content, involve the parents, follow your school's procedure, and never save or forward intimate images of pupils; report them to the police instead.

Report to the platform

All major social networks prohibit bullying and harassment, and under the EU Digital Services Act they must provide an easy way to report illegal content and tell you what they decided. Report only after you have captured.

1. Use the report function directly on the post, comment, message or profile, and choose bullying or harassment as the reason.
2. For fake or impersonation profiles, use the platform's impersonation report form.
3. Save the confirmation or report reference, and add it to your log.
4. If nothing happens, report again and mention it in your school or police report.

Platform guide: capturing evidence from Instagram →

What to do when someone creates a fake profile of your child →

When to go to the police

Not every unkind message is a crime, and many cases are best solved by the school. But go to the police without delay when any of the following is involved:

• Threats of violence, or someone saying they know where your child lives.
• Extortion or blackmail of any kind, including sextortion.
• Hate based on origin, religion, disability, sexual orientation or similar.
• Any sexual content involving a minor, or an adult contacting your child with sexual intentions.
• Persistent stalking or harassment that continues despite the school acting.

Bring your incident log and your captures on a USB stick or printed out. Forensic captures come with a PDF report and hashes, which makes it easier for officers to take them into the file. In most EU countries you can also file a report online first and follow up in person.

Where to get support

Documenting bullying is stressful for parents too. These free, confidential services help children and parents; numbers are correct at the time of writing, but check the service's own website before relying on them.

• 116 111 is the harmonised child helpline number in the EU, for example Linka bezpečí in Czechia and Nummer gegen Kummer in Germany. In Austria children can call Rat auf Draht on 147.
• In France, the 3018 national number and app run by e-Enfance help young people and parents with cyberbullying and can ask platforms to remove content quickly.
• For intimate images of minors, national hotlines of the INHOPE network, such as STOPonline.cz, jugendschutz.net or the Internet-Beschwerdestelle, and in France PHAROS, accept reports and pass them on to the police.
• Your child's school counsellor, school psychologist or a trusted teacher can also support your child day to day.

Most of all, keep talking to your child. Evidence helps adults act, but what helps a child recover is knowing that someone believes them and is on their side.

Frequently asked questions

This article is general information for parents and school staff, not legal advice. Laws and helpline numbers differ between countries; in an emergency call 112.